Comprehensive Consent Training

Comprehensive consent training for young teenagers is absolutely vital. Consent training, in this way, must be the absolute crux of any sex education at school. Young teenagers attending school are learning how to put condoms on bananas, and even asking them what kinds of sex acts they may prefer. I understand the need to teach safe recreational sex (i.e. with protection), but exposing them to kink is not appropriate, just as access to pornography should be blocked until a person is 18 years adult.

A core and key part of comprehensive consent training must be promoting the need for unequivocal verbal consent to each potential sex act people may engage in with each other. This capacity for unequivocal verbal consent is what separates sexual consent in humans from animals who must rely on kinesic and/or vocal sound utterances without language forms of consent alone. Humans are blessed with the virtue of language based consent which should be used considerately and comprehensively, not leaving any doubt as to mutual consent of all parties to sexual interaction to each subsequent sex act engaged in; this must be immediately proximate and prior time-wise to a given sexual activity, e.g. to ask “what would you like me to do next?” or “I would like to do ‘X’ [sex act giving details thereof], would that be okay with you?” or “should we keep going?” or “should I keep going?” are/can/should be a part of asking for consent, and with restraint if verbal consent is denied. An ongoing dialogue is necessary.

We must not see this precise and respectfully a lot more fool-proof verbal consenting prior to each sex act – that is when consent is given, to be a ‘kill-joy’.

Respecting each other’s decisions around consent and when it is not granted or withdrawn at any time, will go towards humans becoming more truly wise (aka real homo sapiens), in this integral realm and bedrock of sexual relations.

Precise and comprehensive consent training would be robust enough so as men who consume pornography understand the need for nuances of consent in real, non-virtual, sexual interactions with others gaining consent and employing restraint when consent is not granted through verbal means. It is ample now to unequivocally dispel the myth that just because a male or man consumes pornography, that it prevents them from gaining and maintaining consent and restraining from acting where it is not given or is retracted in sexual interaction(s). This is a non-sequitur if consent training is necessarily comprehensive at a young age (when beginning puberty).

Whilst many universities require a comprehensive consent compulsory module or modules for their students, is very commendable, this is far too late. And, what of the peoples not enrolled in university or enrolled in an university that does not have a consent module? Comprehensive consent training should be earlier, before teenagers may become sexually active with each other.

Whilst there are objective standards and thresholds of what constitutes sexual assault and rape, consent can be on a continuum: that is why the highest levels of consent must be mutually attained, maintained and negotiated verbally as above. This will save us a whole lot of heartache, and will allow us to be more respectfully enchanted in our sexual relations with one another. Compassion is the answer!